Chinese parents have a phrase that directly translates to “don’t move your hands and feet.” When my brother and I would get into a scuffle, my mom would angrily shout that phrase to us telling us to stop hitting each other.
The funny thing is, right now, we are saying the complete opposite to our baby.
“Alright little baby kick and punch to all your little heart’s content!”
“It’s just your mom’s innards, don’t worry!”
We encourage the movements. The sudden “oofffs” coming from my wife is quite reassuring. Cause those days when baby is not as active, my day becomes…well scary.
So far I’ve learned that the moment you become a parent, you just naturally worry. Even though we are only 23 weeks in, I’ve already grown a few grey hairs and I anticipate losing a few existing hair as well.
The days when I ask my wife, how’s baby today I’m really asking for my own sake.
I’m actually surprised by how easily a thought bubble can escalate to paranoia. But I guess this is only the beginning right?
Pretty soon I’ll start asking questions like:
“Is baby sleeping well?”
“Is formula safe?”
“Is the room too cold? Too hot?
“Is this the right car seat?”
“Is this the right daycare?”
“Is that kid bullying our kid?”
“Is our kid bullying the other kid?”
“Is that a face tattoo?”
(Yep our baby is going to have a pretty badass first year…tattoos and all.)
So many questions and worries. So much paranoia, so many more greys and so much more hair loss to come. But you know what?
This is only fair.
If there’s one thing that this pregnancy has taught me, it is that I really need to appreciate what my folks had to go through mentally just to make sure both my brother and I end up where we are today.
What’s crazier is that our kid will not understand what we are going through, until they eventually become parents.
And I guess that truly is the sucky thing. When you’re a parent, your kids will not understand the sacrifices and worries you’ve endured for them.
And when they’re old enough to understand, they’ll simply repeat the same cycle.
This is like a cycle of parental appreciation ignorance.